The phone rang as I worked on a sermon focused on domestic violence. As I shared my thoughts of what to say in church, my friend said to me, “church is where the silence begins.” I felt that sinking feeling in my heart. We are comfortable talking about marriages and births. We are quick to discuss diagnosis, treatments, hospice, and cancer. But abuse in the home tends to stay in the shadows even as we know it is common and devastating–causing neurological changes that can persist through life.

This month, the Broad Bay Church hung purple flags, each with the name of one whose life has been impacted by domestic violence. There are a lot of them. It is up to us to break the silence.

It is up to us to be a healing force: to listen to the stories that are hard to hear and to notice the violence that is all around us.
–To listen and to be present when folks are ready to risk sharing the pain.
–To listen and be present when folks are not ready to risk and share the pain.
–To affirm with our whole being that God does not will violence against another.

There is a story about a young girl who was late coming home from school. Her parent scolded her until she told this story. “I was walking home and noticed the new girl in the neighborhood sitting on her porch holding a doll. The doll’s head had broken off and she was crying. So I helped her.”

“Oh,” the parent said, “how did you fix the doll?”

“I didn’t fix the doll. It was broken. I helped her cry.”

May the church become a place where the silence is broken and the tears are shared.